Well, it’s mid-September and I’m white, so that means I’m rocking some Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Spice Rooibus.
Mid-September also means lovely walks in Forest Park, which are considerably less “lovely” when you are waddling along like a duck that’s been force-fed in preparation for being turned into foie gras, but hey.
All right, that was just to cheer everyone up. September also means that the MLA Jobs Information List is in “full swing,” so let’s see what we’re working with today in the walking sarcophagus that is German Studies. Most Germanists are currently huddled together about four hours down the Interstate from me, in fact, giving panels like their discipline still exists at the annual conference of the German Studies Association. If anyone wants to report back to me on the size of the pall there (on a scale from “complete denial” to “recognition of aforementioned walking sarcophagus”), please do, and please say hi to everyone from me. Maybe someday Eric Jarosinski and I can do a “Germanists Gone Wild” roundtable and I’ll return to GSA, but until then, we can fairly safely consider my life Major Disciplinary Conference Free. All right, now I’m just dawdling, because I don’t want to have to share such carnage, but, enough, here goes:
1. Berkeley. “Assistant Professor of Modern German Literature.” Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaha. Gather ’round, little children, for the Story of the Story of Everest, Berkeley-style. For over a decade, the departments of German and Comp Lit attempted a joint hire, and for over a decade (at least three searches) they failed. And everyone is too scared to say why, but I’m not: Judith Butler. When I talk to people with experience with this search (on both sides of it), they always speak of the impossibilities of pleasing “a certain eminent scholar” in hushed tones, but I’m not fucking afraid of Judith Butler. So. Now, finally, at long last, the German department has got its own hire. IT’S YOUR BIG CHANCE GUYS. YOU’RE BUTLER-FREE. GO FORTH. DON’T FUCK IT UP. No pressure.
2. UPDATE: UNC-Asheville. I had discussed this one (which appeared on the wiki before the JIL) last week, so I thought it was in last week’s total, but it’s technically on this week’s list, so: go for it! My uncle was chancellor of UNCA for years–to0 bad he’s retired now, because otherwise I’d be ON THAT with a li’l NEPOTIZZZZZ, you know what I mean? Because we have the same last name and everything. But, several years too late for both of us, I suppose. My uncle is a really nice guy, though, and pretty much the #1 reason I know that #notalladministrators are schmucks, because he is not a schmuck. So here’s to you, Sam, you’re the best. I hope your emeritus employer (where there is now, appropriately enough, a fitness center named after you, in true Schuman fitnorexic style) does you proud and hires someone nice (PERHAPS the insider? I’d wager the insider is nice…)
that’s the sole, we’re talking only, those are all two tenure-track German job listed this week. So, the “good news” — we’re in double digits now. And there was a more than 10% 20% increase from last week! See, the bright side of small numbers!!!!
The bad news: Well, reality. Reality is the bad news. I feel like holding a German Studies Dirge-Writing contest so that at least this year’s PhDs have a fighting chance to win something. Any takers?