- "Saving It For Marriage" (with the optional "This Cushion Ain’t for Pushin’")
- "Die Welt vom Innen ist der Wille zur Macht und nichts ausserdem" (look it up)
- "I NEED YOU TO LOOK AT MY ASS BECAUSE I HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM"
- "If I Could Actually Fit a Corporate Logo IN my Ass, I Would, Except Then You Wouldn’t See It"
- "Rusty Trombones $20"