file under “why I shouldn’t be allowed vacation”

Here are some things I’ve done since I finished my work for the quarter, in addition to a half-assed design update of this sweet-ass blog that exactly one person named "me" reads:

  1. mopped the kitchen floor with laundry detergent (someone absconded with my Mr Clean)
  2. re-color-coded the clothes in my closet (things should be with their friends and my closet should look like a beautiful rainbow made mostly from black clothes with the necks cut out)
  3. turned a paper into an icky technicolor website for some sort of academic purpose that has yet to be proven
  4. re-arranged my dresser to look exactly like it did before only slightly less dusty
  5. ate approx. 17 oranges and a persimmon and some of the "world’s largest cashews" and approx. 95 bagel chips (I am back on wheat, thank the eff)
  6. took a "nature walk" through the backyards of a bunch of subdivisions and an "ecological preserve" that looks like the backyard of a bunch of subdivisions
  7. talked to exactly no people except my friend Erin on the phone for 5 minutes
  8. stacked my library books in a stack to be taken back to the library IMMEDIATELY as per the email sent to me by the library last night at 9 p.m. when the library was closed, or at least the ILL desk to which my books must IMMEDIATELY be returned was
  9. looked up all sorts of people I don’t talk to anymore on Friendster and MySpace as if something might have changed with them since the last time I did this when I was done with my academic work (Winter quarter last year, thanks for asking)
  10. watched approx. eleventeen episodes of "Law & Order"
  11. went swimming, outdoors, in December, because this is California
  12. moisturized my eyeballs because this is CALIFORNIA
  13. scrubbed my bathroom with laundry detergent because someone absconded with my Mr. Clean
  14. customized the filters on my school email so that everyone’s mail gets sent to a special folder so that I no longer log in to find an inbox with messages in it and allow my hopes to soar that someone I like might have sent me a message only to find a very important bulletin about my apartment complex’s speed bumps
  15. enjoyed approximately 90 seconds of TOTAL CHAOS when the power in the aforementioned complex went out while I was getting my laundry, which I then folded while watching "The Closer" even though I hate "The Closer"
  16. didn’t talk to anyone or do anything since everyone but me is still writing papers
  17. didn’t go anywhere because I don’t have any money
  18. didn’t read anything because…well, I didn’t want to tell you guys this before, but I don’t know how to read. Which I hope the people who have to read/grade my essays this quarter understand before it’s too late…
  19. worried on behalf of my students, who have to take their German final tomorrow
  20. made the most boring! list! ever! on this blog in a massive, massive cry for help, by which I mean "distraction," by which I mean "someone email me or call me with something interesting to say because I am bored and drained of all energy, and that includes energy to call anyone or write anything interesting but who doesn’t love attention? I sure do."

Meh. (Shrug shrug shrug: meh).

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