The Adjunct Petition Challenge — Watch Me Humiliate Myself (More Than Usual)!

Friends, Probably-not-Romans (but who knows?), Americans:

This spiffy petition, by Ann Kottner, Joe Fruscione and many of their hero compatriots, asking the US Dept. of Labor’s Wage and Hour Division to investigate the labor conditions of adjunct professors in our country, currently has about 5500 signatures. It would be very exciting if it had more signatures than that — especially from you tenured and tenure-track faculty I allegedly hate (JK, especially from anyone for any reason!). So here’s the deal.

I’m going to keep watching this petition, and when it hits 7500 signatures, I will, in the spirit of my friend Gordon Haber, upload a YouTube video of myself lip-syncing — WITH FEELING — to the song of your choice (as suggested in the comments below). I would prefer a German pop song from the 80s (I would prefer “Major Tom (Völlig losgelöscht),” if we’re being particular), but if there’s anything being an adult has taught me, it’s that preferences are for chipmunks (who, in my four weeks in Chipmunk Central here in upstate NY, I can definitively state get all of theirs, including taking roost in the roof of the house right over where SchuFetus and I attempt, with varying degrees of failure, to sleep).

At any rate, please sign, please share, and please take an active role in my impending humiliation.

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39 comments

  1. I signed it a week ago, does that count? Unfortunately, the only German pop songs I know are Major Tom, 99 Luftballons, and is Amadeus German or no? I’d also accept anything from The Hoff (Hasselhoff).

      1. So basically, you’re going to pull a student move and just do whatever you want no matter what the directions are? haha (I don’t care, Major Tom is an excellent song and one that deserves off-key signing along at high volumes)

  2. It will happen, so you might as well practice. My choice is “These Boots Were Made for Walking” — adjunct style.

  3. Consensus is clear. You will have to alternate between Major Tom and 99 Luftballoons or Wicked Little Town from Hedwig And the Angry Inch.

  4. Signed! And with my work address and work e-mail!

    (You know, even though it’s in English, most power metal is German. And if you *really* wanted to humiliate yourself, you’d choose something with no cultural cachet whatsoever…) <–LOOK I THINK I JUST COMPROMISED MY COMMENTING IDENTITY

  5. Lots of great options for lip syncing, but there’s one in particular I would like to see *you* perform: Marlene Dietrich’s “Ich bin von Kopf bis Fuß auf Liebe eingestellt.”

    1. I think I may have just snorted a tomato seed up my nose. Note to self: do not read Rebecca’s blog whilst eating salad.

  6. Signed, Sealed, Delivered (totally ripping off Stevie Wonder and the Obama campaign). Hmm…maybe you could accompany the completion of the petition with a rendition of a line or two of the song though…in English of course. ;) Kidding, but maybe not. Hopefully the number of signees will skyrocket further once the countdown to Fall 2014 semesters being…..

    BTW–loved the Slate article. And, so true, the inability to ask questions in grad school. I remember one faculty member talking about the Chronicle of Higher Ed, back in the early 2000s and I had no idea what it was…and did not dare ask esp. bc this guy was one of the Prick–hood Laureates.

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