Ihr seid supergeil, supergeil

[UPDATE: Möbius loop: Here is the Slate BrowBeat post from which I link to this post, to provide the translation for that post, which then linked back to this post…]

If you have an Internet, chances are someone has posted this viral video, “Supergeil,” to a social media near you. It’s a 3-minute promotional clip for the German supermarket chain EDEKA. Though I’m an Aldifrau myself, I find this vid irresistible, and although its incredibleness is without borders or a language, I also thought it was my DUTY as a Germanist to translate it for you, meine Leute, denn ihr seid supergeil, supergeil. Jetzt geht’s los! 

As I’ve also written on Slate, “geil” has a double meaning–it means “cool,” but it also means “horny.” I’ve only translated it as “cool” here, but please keep the double-meaning in mind–or else the video might not make any sense (ha)!

Super süß, super sexy, super easy, supergeil
Super Leute, super lieb, super Love, supergeil
Super Uschi, super Muschi, super Sushi, supergeil
Super heftig, super deftig, super lässig, supergeil
Super fit, super fresh, super Livestyle, supergeil
Super Power, super stark, super Markt, supergeil

Super sweet, super sexy, super easy, super-cool
Super people, super cute, super love, super-cool
Super Uschi*, super pussy**, super sushi, super-cool
Super fierce, super hearty, super easygoing, super-cool
Super fit, super fresh, super lifestyle, super-cool
Super power, super strong, supermarket, super-cool

CHORUS:

Es ist supergeil, supergeil
Richtig supergeil, supergeil
Ich finds supergeil, supergeil
Denn du bist supergeil

It is super-cool, super-cool
Absolutely super-cool, super-cool
I find it super-cool, super-cool
Because you are super-cool

Super knister, super knusper, super Snack, supergeil
Super Freunde, super spritzig, super Party, supergeil
Super Optik, super chillig, super Cookies, supergeil
Super Sonntag, super Montag, super lazy, supergeil
Super crunchy, super tasty, super crazy, supergeil
Super fruchtig, super lecker, super smooth, supergeil

Super sizzling, super crispy, super snack, super-cool
Super friends, super fizzy, super party, super-cool
Super optics, super chill, super cookies, super-cool
Super Sunday, super Monday, super lazy, super-cool***
Super crunchy, super tasty, super crazy, super-cool
Super fruity, super delicious, super smooth, super-cool

[CHORUS]

Sehr, sehr geile Sachen hier
Bio ist auch sehr, sehr geil
Sehr geile Bioprodukte, toll

Very, very cool stuff here
Organic is also very, very cool
Very cool organic products, excellent

[CHORUS]

Guck ma hier, sehr, sehr geile Fritten, super
Sehr geiler Dorsch übrigens, sehr geil
Oh hier, Klopapier, oh, das ist aber weich
Sehr, sehr geil, super

Oh check it out, very, very cool fries, super
Very cool cod, by the way, very cool
Oh look here, toilet paper, ooh, now that’s soft****
Very, very cool, super

*nickname for Ursula, also, thanks to the smarts of a native-German commenter, sometimes slang for “sexy lady”

**DOUBLE ENTENDRE OOH NAUGHTY

***German bread is the pride of the country (for good reason, shit is DIVINE). But bakeries, like very other German-owned business in the country, are either closed on Sundays or have very reduced hours. Since Germans would never dream of eating stale bread (yes, they hit the bakery almost every day), there is a special processed kind of mostly-baked, finish-in-your-oven bread sold at the store, often (but not always) croissants or some other fatty bread, called Sonntagsbrötchen (“Sunday-bread”), for freezing and baking on Sunday so that you can still have “fresh” bread at your big Sunday dinner (which is actually lunch).

****a PERNICIOUS falsehood. German toilet paper is like sandpaper dipped in spikes. Germans are much more environmentally friendly than we are, and as such their paper products are almost all recycled, and their TP is all VERY easy to dissolve, since many of their pipes are 900 years old. Butt-softness is literally the last thing any German roll of toilet paper gives–ahem–a crap about. If you want butt-softness, you use the special aloe-covered butt wipes NEXT to the toilet paper (which, after the toilet paper, you’ll need).

DOUBLE UPDATE! Here is my annotated reply to the most inadvertently German Slate comment by a German I have ever received.

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49 thoughts on “Ihr seid supergeil, supergeil

  1. I just want to add that “geil” used to mean “horny”. It has been kidnapped by the younger generation to mean, yes, “cool” or “awesome”, to the never-ending consternation of the older folks, who just cannot get it out of their mouth in the new meaning

  2. No way, it even includes the entire singular conjugation of the verb “to be” in the present tense! This is hitting the screens of every 101 class in the country tomorrow.

  3. “German bread is the pride of the country (for good reason, shit is DIVINE).”

    – I don’t like bread. At least, that’s what I thought before I traveled to Germany and ate German bread. That experience was orgasmic.

    1. Here’s my favorite anecdote about German bread (apocryphal, I’m sure): What convinced German prisoners of war in an American camp that the Americans were meanies after all was that their captors gave them bread to eat that they, the Americans, could not possibly eat themselves (it was Wonderbread).

  4. I can’t even express how much I love this ad.

    Also, I’d like to point out two things – my British roommate also used to use the word “horny” to mean “cool,” as in “J. just bought a really horny truck.” Definitely took me aback on occasion. Also, I bet the fine people at EDEKA are implicitly playing off the old Saturn “Geiz ist geil” (“cheap is cool”) campaign, which was incredibly successful but helped drive German price-consciousness to new heights, to the despair of many retailers. Here it’s not the price that’s geil, but the store and it’s products. Marketing genius!

  5. Just to prevent you from having to go without proper Sonntagsbrötchen on your next visit: Germans are so fond of their Brötchen that the law requiring stores to remain closed on Sundays (you’re wondering if there is a long German word for that? Why yes, it’s “Ladenschlussgesetz”) has an exception for bakeries. You should not have a hard time finding one, typical Sunday hours are 8-12.

    1. Yeah, I live in a village of 3000 people. There are 3 bakeries and 2 are open Sunday mornings. Most areas have at least 1 bakery with Sunday morning hours.

  6. Pingback: Supergeil
  7. I lived in Berlin in the 90s. Herr Liechtenstein’s jaw-dropping eccentricity… is extraordinary… but nothing you wouldn’t expect to meet on a 2-stop trip on the U Bahn.

  8. This ad is indeed super-geil.
    I’m pretty sure that the word where you have “knister” is actually “kiste”, referring to the purple Merc (kiste, literally “box” is slang for car).

    1. Hey I’m from Germany and he sang “knister”, not “kiste”. And knister doesn’t mean “car”, but something like crunchy or a sizzling and cracking noise.
      Sorry for possible mistake in the text ;)

  9. FYI, there are lots of slang terms for “Uschi,” too, not just “Ursula.” I have seen it used to mean “sexy woman,” “f** hag,” and, within the gay community, an effeminate guy.

    1. Thats right. To strengthen what you mean (if you mean sexy woman), you can say “geile Uschi”, which then is more on the horny-side of meaning ;)

  10. Uschi – could this instead be the Japanese word “oishii”, which means delicious/tasty? I don’t speak German, but when I heard the song and saw the context (woman eating sushi) I automatically went to the little Japanese I know and thought he was saying “oishii”. Unless the name Ursula also makes sense, but I would have to be enlightened on what the heck that means. Anyone?

      1. Oha, da wäre die Uschi aber entsetzt, wenn jemand gesagt hätte sie wäre eine Schlampe!

        In all seriousness, Uschi is more often than not the sort of name some respectable upper middle class matron might have. It’s no longer that common for parents to name their girls Uschi or Ursula. Especially since it is so close to the really naughty Muschi (pussy) term (which, like its English translation, has become more common as the euphemism than as the original feline).

  11. Edeka has been pushing the boundaries, and had a second advert in Berlin cinemas featuring two stoners. That one actually is responding to how a discount chain inadvertently offered pot grow lights. Watch it, and see them start to lose it when they are offered a bag. :)

    Edeka does have a sort of double life, as here in Munich it tends to be more upscale and well stocked, yet out in the small towns they tend to be tiny, shabby little stores. The same is true with Tengelmann, which is widely varying (the one closest to me is so small it’s actually split in between three houses!).

    1. And if you watch closely, those two stoners get a cameo in this spot (super cookies! / Schoko cookies – voll günstig!)

      By the way, although “Kiste” would fit perfectly, he indeed sings “knister”

  12. Whenever I hear the name “Uschi” I think of model/sexual liberation icon/rockstar girlfriend Uschi Obermaier. As a bonus, there’s a bar in Berlin called “Muschi Obermaier.”

      1. http://www.jnd.org/dn.mss/toilet_paper_algorit.html

        and (in german):

        http://www.focus.de/finanzen/news/klopapier_aid_91542.html

        those who crumple their paper need thin, softer toilet paper, folders need thicker, more durable paper. Most germans fold, so those few crumplers get thick, inflexible paper which is suboptimal for the used technique.

        B.t.w., there is a third fraction: the wrappers…

        http://www.nur-toilettenpapier.de/content/falten-kn-llen-wickeln-toilettenpapier-und-wie-es-benutzt-wird.html

        Seems like we germans are quite anally retentive to have a website “just toilet paper”

  13. Sure were some hot chicks in that video. I lived in the Fatherland in 51 when it was still in rubbles. Always loved the place.

  14. I must say, German toilet paper has become remarkably softer in the last three years. Perhaps because of the number of Germans that have visited the states? Even the cheap stuff from Lidl is good now.

  15. I find it funny you link “Super Sonntag, super Montag” to bread when the competition has been airing ads about “Super Samstag” just before this campaign.

    While the bread pride thing is mostly true, Aufbackbröchen are the most white-trash food I can think of.

    1. Yeah they’re super gross, BUT I think Edeka’s point was that they’re excellent for the “super lazy.” Keep in mind that I am in the US right now so I have no idea what other Werbungen are on–heading back to the Vaterland this summer though, so I’ll catch up (and probably not shop at Edeka, which I never liked!).

      1. I have been living in the US for over 30 years, and I tell you, when the supermarket started to sell “French dinner rolls” that I can re-bake at 450 F to give them a real crust, it made a huge difference for my breakfast. Plus, several visiting friends from Cologne have agreed with me that they are at least as good as what the local baker sells over there. But there is no way to get anything close to “Graubrot” in its myriad forms–so I gorge on it when I’m in Cologne.

  16. I’m an American living in Germany and I LOVE German toilet paper! In fact, many of my friends that have moved back to the States in the past couple years have hoarded German toilet paper to take with them and when it’s my turn to leave, I will be, too! :)

      1. I think it has. I lived here back in 2001-2004, too, and I don’t remember it being this amazing back then. :) It’s thick, soft, way cheaper than American tp and the companies are always putting out limited edition scented paper. LOL.

    1. I was also going to say that I was in Germany just last summer, and have visited every 2-3 years for the last 10 and have found the TP quite similar to the TP I buy in the US – of course I buy the stuff made from recycled paper, so mine isn’t as cushiony as many of the American brands… I still think it’s funny, though, that German TP is often 3-ply or even (at the Hotel Adlon in Berlin) 4-ply! That’s probably not really so funny… but I remember as a kid that Charmin and the like used to brag in their TV ads about being “luxurious” at 2-ply.

      1. There are differences from the places. You can buy 3-ply (I guess that means “Dreilagig”?) and also 4-ply in the mentioned Lidl (and I guess also in Aldi, of course also in Edeka). While I consider the last to be snobish, the 3-ply stuff is awesome ;) If you however use a public toilet or a toilet on, say, a university campus, you will get the cheapest crap with the mentioned problems.

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